I am staying in a place called Honey Resort. How appropriate that it is named after food, because, after the beaches, beautiful scenery, relaxed lifestyle, and the gorgeous sweet-natured people, for me, a big drawcard to Thailand is the food.

When I booked Honey Resort, it was billed as a 3 star hotel; nothing fancy. After an hour airport bus trip into town, another hour dusty local bus ride to Kata Beach, and a hot and sweaty 400m walk from the bus stop, when I turn the corner into my street and see the building, I do a double-take and the angels begin to sing; the resort is like paradise. After all the nights in small rooms/hostels with shared bathrooms and non-working light fixtures/plumbing, I have a bath and a balcony that overlooks the pool – bliss. Sawasdee! Welcome to Thailand! It is not swish but I realise my dollar goes further here. Plus, I wanted a treat at the end of my trip, as Thailand is my last stop. It is time for some moments of peace and ocean-gazing at the beach – a holiday at the end of my holiday if you like – and a week off; no tours, no sight-seeing, just chilling out. I wonder if I am capable of doing nothing. I am not really that kind of person, but also it is necessary to refresh before returning home.

I overnighted in an airport hotel in Bangkok prior to flying to the island of Phuket (pronounced pooket) just over an hour’s flight in Thailand’s south. Kata is on the western coast and at the quieter end of the island of Phuket. I carry only one bag, my small cabin-size one weighing 6.5 kg (I am allowed 7kg) – I figure I don’t need much stuff to lie on a beach. It only cost me AUD$48 return (including my cabin baggage) on Viet Jet low cost carrier. On the flight I meet a friendly American woman and we get on well enough to arrange to catch up again the next day. Apart from resting on the beach (and later, a day trip to the islands), I have no plans, after all.

Honey Resort, whose only downside was an arguing/crying couple in the room next to mine for two nights, is only 150 metres from the beach. Admittedly, you have to cross a crazy busy road and walk past a smelly open stormwater drain to get to it, as well as numerous shops selling tours, souvenirs, and massages. Kata is a long curved beach with fine grained sand and small surf fronted by restaurants and food stalls. To be unbiased and honest, Australian beaches are superior. However, the sunset over the ocean that first night in Phuket was spectacular.

Food. I love a Thai curry so it is an easy choice, out of all the restaurant touts trying to draw you in, to go for one selling just authentic Thai food. What surprises me is that all the signage is in Russian. Yes, Russian. Followed by Chinese, and lastly, English. Thinking about it, it is probably only a 8-10 hour flight from Moscow to Phuket direct. But it is a strange sight to see these burly tall white people with skin burned to a beet red trying to haggle with the locals in Russian-accented English. They would even speak Russian to me! I can’t speak Russian. What was weirder was when I ordered a meal from one local guy at a food stall and he would confirm what I said, not with “Ok” but with “Da”. Food-wise, I want to try a different Thai dish each day, washed down with lashings of local Chang beer.

I love reading in general, but I really love reading to relax. I cannot find a Thai author on my library app. I am here for a week and I spotted a bookshelf in the hotel on arrival, filled to overflowing with books. Yay! On my way back from breakfast I check out the bookshelves. Unfortunately, out of all the books there I find only three written in English! The rest are Russian, with some Scandinavian. Fortunately, of the three books, I find Dan Brown’s The Lost Symbol  – a huge tome that is a bit heavy to carry to the beach but that will keep me occupied for a few days.

I spend the next few days swimming and reading at the beach or relaxing in the aircon of my room venturing out of my haven in the late afternoon in search of food, getting a couple of massages (1 hour full body for AUD$16 – yes, I’ll have one of those, thank you) along the way and checking out the area. I was planning to hire a motorbike and explore including a drive up to the Big Buddha but didn’t for three reasons. First the Buddha, though impressive in size, is made of concrete and was only constructed within the last few years so I wasn’t that interested. Second, you need a proper motorbike license and you are not supposed to drive without one (you cannot use a car license). You are ‘discouraged’ from hiring motorbikes without a valid license by being told you could face an exorbitant fine from police of about AUD$50. This obviously does not scare people off as there are many tourists travelling around on motorbikes without helmets and wearing only T-shirts, shorts, and thongs on their feet. Now, I know this is Asia, and dodginess is the word and a lot of the population drive without helmets/footwear etc. But they are used to it. Tourists like me who have never driven a bike, let alone ridden on one, hire them willy nilly and think they’ll be fine in the crazy ‘no rules’ traffic. So, third reason. I saw so many tourists nursing injuries after crashing or coming off their bikes, and still riding them! I wanted to enjoy the last days of my trip, not spend them nursing broken bones.

The beach itself is relaxing and I go early morning before the tourists and the heat of the sun get too much. One thing that I notice about the Russian tourists at the beach is the expanse of white/beetroot red flesh. There is a distinct lack of tattoos – something I am not used to seeing that in Australia where they are ubiquitous. It is funny to sit there on the sand looking out to sea and watch what looks like disembodied unattached heads bobbing on the ocean swell. Entering the surf is like walking into a cool bathtub, one where I can see the sandy bottom. Each time I set up my towel and book,  there is no one around me for at least 5 metres – beach etiquette. The only sound is the small surf and occasional motors of the longtail boats sitting just outside the roped off swimming area. But not 5 minutes after I lay my towel down and sort my belongings, a  large Russian woman plonks her stuff and her body down almost beside me. There is a whole beach to choose from and she sits one metre away. I shake my head and go for a swim. The next day she repeats this scene. The third day, she brings her husband along and prepares to sit. He takes one look at her in puzzlement, looks over at me in a kind of apology, says something in Russian to her under his breath and gestures further away, where they eventually relocate. Finally. I say thank you in Thai (sounds like cup koong ka – the ka is added on the end for a female).

After a couple of days of total refreshing leisure, the smaller picturesque islands are calling. I organise an all day visit to the islands – from hotel to islands and back to hotel – for AUD$80 all inclusive via speedboat! They collect me at 0715 and after picking up a few more people we are speeding to the port of Phuket. Getting there takes over an hour with the peak hour traffic. Then a debrief follows explaining about how to snorkel, what the day holds (including a visit to a monkey island where the men are told to watch their genitals as the monkeys like to grab things!), offering everyone sea-sickness pills, and organising us into groups. We are all hankering to get going. We will visit a couple of different islands as part of the Phi Phi island group (pronounce pee pee) at least an hour boat ride away, stopping for lunch on Phi Phi Don, snorkeling over a coral reef, and visiting the place where the movie The Beach was filmed.

We take off our shoes as we climb aboard; we won’t see them again until the return. Our speedboat comes with a great, English speaking guide called Mr James Bond ( not his real name but he calls himself this anyway, or 007), a small crew, and our own pirate. The ocean breeze is invigorating as our speedboat jumps the waves toward the dramatic horizon dotted with steep-sided lush islets.

Apart from the sensational sheer cliffs of the islands that just drop into the sea, the ocean, especially around the islands, is clear and of an amazing aqua-blue colour which is just stunning. With a quick dip at each place, we all become adept at getting on and off the boat, assisted  our pirate. By the time we reach the coral to snorkel, we are ready to get completely wet. Even though the current is not strong, it surprises me how many people require lifejackets. There are plenty of colourful fish but also many crown-of-thorns starfish which is a concern, especially when you are floating above them and the tide washes you closer to them in a surprise maneouvre. Later after our lunch stop, the afternoon storm clouds gather and we get rained on but nobody really cares as we are already wet. It is a wonderful day in an outstanding place, and Thailand’s beauty is breath-taking.

A week here is a breath of fresh air, literally, and just what I needed before returning to the chaos of Bangkok.